Highlights
Ears: The Soft Power of Listening - Part 7 (Episode 44) Miracle Grow for Relationships
Marriage
The decision to get married is weighted heavily toward what we see...is this person physically attractive to me? But the decision to stay married is weighted more toward what we hear...do I have satisfying communication with my spouse?
Thirty-six Questions that Lead to Love, (NYT January 9, 2015)
Communication Exercise - Ask: What’s the biggest thing impacting you and how are you feeling about it? (Emotionally Healthy Discipleship, Pete Scazzero)
Family Relationships
Too often we’re overly concerned with ourselves, too much so to take a moment to really understand what’s going on with someone else, and make sure they know that we understand. I often say, ‘You don’t understand people when you understand them. You understand them when they understand that you understand.’ That’s when you know you have trust...so just listen, listen, listen. (The Power of the Other, Henry Cloud)
Friendships
You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you. (Dale Carnegie)
Work-place Relationships
Google found out that successful teams listened to one another. Members took turns, heard one another out, and paid attention to nonverbal cues to pick up on unspoken thoughts and feelings... It created an atmosphere of so-called psychological safety, where people were more likely to share information and ideas without fear of being talked over or dismissed. (You’re Not Listening, Kate Murphy)
(Doctors who don’t get sued) were more likely to engage in active listening, saying such things as “Go on, tell me more about that,”...the difference was entirely in how they talked to their patients. ( Blink, Malcolm Gladwell)
Leadership
(Leadership in Turbulent Times, Doris Kearns Goodwin)
Listen, learn and love. (Cynt Marshall CEO - Dallas Mavericks)
There’s a constant temptation in leadership to feel like you need to know all the answers.That’s never true. In fact, the best leaders are usually not defined by the answers they give but
Page 1 of 2
by the questions they ask. The longer you’re in leadership, the more curious you should become. One tell-tale sign of a leader who has lost their edge is they ask almost no questions. Sometimes that’s because you think you know all the answers. Other times, it’s because you’ve lost interest. You’re just not curious. Both are deadly to leadership. So...next time you’re in a conversation or meeting, speak more sentences that end with a question mark than you do sentences that end with a period. (Carey Nieuwhoff)
I will present to you parts of my self...slowly, if you are patient and tender. I will open drawers that mostly stay closed and bring out places and people and things...loves and frustrations, hopes and sadnesses...bits and pieces of decades of life...They are me. If you regard them lightly, deny that they are important, judge me or fail to listen well...I will quietly...slowly...begin to wrap them up, like worn jewelry, tuck them away in my small chest of drawers...and close.”